Walk a mile in my shoes-
As unlikely as it might seem, not every day is all about Ivey. She does get the spotlight here and an unequal surplus of my time on an ordinary day. She, Ivey, is one of three. So I battle the guilty life of wanting to divide time equally, always failing and praying that they, all three of my children, will appreciate the effort some day.
Today was one of those days that was not about Ivey and her improvements, accomplishments, dis-ABILITIES, or any of the latter. Today was about an ordinary day. Today was a day that we, I and my children, have worked very hard for and in some aspects, we have earned. Normalcy.
Today was a little more about the boys. Today was a day about Ivey learning to be ''the baby" and fighting for her own moment in the spotlight – just like any other sibling with older brothers/sisters. Today was another step in Ivey's life toward normalcy.
Today dear Stranger, I did mind. I know that You probably had good intentions. I realize that You were inquisitive. And yes, I encourage both on most occasions. You invaded our time. Yes, my daughter does look a little different than You. But please do not point that out in the middle of a store, especially when You are within arms reach of my children, all three. My sons see their sister only as perfection. Yes, they know she has differences. We were there for my sons today, not to put my daughter in a spotlight that I am most certain You would never want to find Yourself.
So the next time You feel the urge to be polite and sweetly step into our Life, put Yourself in our shoes. Put Yourself in my daughter's shoes. In front of my two year old daughter, You asked if there was anything else wrong? As a mother, would You handle the situation as I did, with a smile? What if it were Your sister? Again, what if it were You??????
I may have told you 'No, I don't mind' today, but I did.
Just watch the video below. Would you really want to be the one to alter their untarnished perception of their sister?
I want to thank all of our friends and family from the bottom of my heart for not making a difference. All of your love and support pulls us through these moments. Thank you Martha for holding her this morning. We love you all so much.
Comments
In my case I have a child with beautiful auburn curly hair. And she is always the one that gets the comments right in front of the other children. People have to be careful even when they are good intentioned. I know she has beautiful hair but my other children are beautiful and precious too. They dont realize that commenting on her hair all the time it is putting so much emphasis on the outward beauty. They dont realize that she is the hardest personality to work with and curb into a well mannered nature. While the other children get no comment and are well behaved. What the world thinks that beauty is, is not what God thinks beauty is. It is what is on the inside. I have to remind my little girl of that all the time because of well meaning people.
Please keep telling us how you feel. I enjoy your blog.
I love you,
Tami
Lots of love, Jill & Ella
And I KNOW that Miss Ivey is going to walk. Like most things...when she is darned good and ready.
Allison W
I was just watching the videos below this post, and catching up on your blog. I had not even read the post yet, and I commented to Jonathan, "wow, those boys are going to take care of her." Regardless of what people do or say, those boys are going to be her guardian angels. You can just see it, especially in the way Walker is cheering her on to take steps. I love it. Thanks for you honesty and openness. People have asked me many times about my kids, where they came from, where are their parents, etc. right in front of them. I just politely answer in the easiest way possible and move on. Thanks for sharing,
wendy
Tera
I love the cheering from mom and dad, but there is something super special when a big sibling just butts in and takes over the "lesson" :) I LOVE IT!!!
That love and care doesn't just "happen" Gwen, you are doing an amazing job at teaching your boys about being a brother!!
Glad I stopped by today...
inspired by you...
liz
I'm glad to hear that you are getting out with Ivey and the boys - I love this trach-free freedom! And look at Ivey walking on those pink painted toes! She is just so adorable. Hugs from us!
Megan and Ava