Touch the Top of the World

Over the course of the past few years a special group who calls themselves the Blanket Ministry has made blankets, delivered them to me via one of Ivey’s fairy Godmothers to be passed on to special people who can give them to children, like Ivey, learning to make their way a dark world. The blankets provide security. They are very special blankets. Not only are they special to the children, they are special to everyone who touches them in the process of passing them on the children.

I was rummaging through the bag counting the blankets, while on the phone arranging the last leg of their journey, when at the bottom of the bag was a book that I had lent Ivey’s Godmother awhile back– and I couldn’t help but catch my breath at the memory of the book. It almost startled me. It reminded me of a time, like many other memories, when we shook our heads in acceptance that this path with Ivey was set even before she was conceived. We just didn’t know it. And even though it is just a book that I could easily go pick up at any bookstore, this particular one is special.

We surrendered talking about the details of the days Ivey and I were both in the hospital immediately following her birth. Sure every now and then Matt and I talk about them, but not really ever do we talk about them with other people. It was a very emotional time, hard on everyone, a lot I don’t remember, and it takes us back to a place we rather leave where it belongs – the past. She is not the same person she was then, and neither are we. But there are a few rare memories that I do have – two are of Knox’s Godfathers –those are Matt’s stories-but in the days following Ivey’s birth they played an important role.

And I realized after seeing that book again, which I thought was tucked away in a box with Ivey’s baby things, that I spend a lot of time talking about all the women in Ivey’s life, but rarely do I mention some of the men who are just as supportive – and who are very involved in our lives, her life, the boys lives and especially Matt’s life – that keep this ship of new normal’s afloat. Seeing the book reminded me of that.

A couple of years before Ivey was born, one of those Godfathers came over to our house one day to visit and brought a book that he had read, and he gave it to me. Once he mentioned that he still doesn’t know what made him or why he gave the book to me that day - not Matt, or anyone for that matter. It was out of character for him. Maybe it was one of the first steps toward preparing – mentally- for Ivey. I file it as one of our God Moments.

Also, for the past couple of weeks we have been in the process of gearing, somewhat bracing, for the surgery that is coming at the beginning of November.  In doing so, Matt and I along with a handful of friends are giving blood to build a blood bank for Ivey.  Just thinking that she might have blood from a friend, another one of those strong men in Ivey's life who is close to Matt, who loves Ivey dearly, who is full of Faith and strength, pumping through her veins gives us comfort.  It is almost impossible to explain. I think that blood will be her blanket during surgery - when we can't physically be with her.