Wal-Mart

This one’s for Gretchen.

What was I thinking this morning? The boys and I headed to Wal-Mart. Unless a limb is severed and band aids are needed, or there is absolutely zilch morsels of food left in the house, it is a place to be avoided at all costs with children. But still, Walker had a gift card from his birthday (in September), and time has been lean here lately, so I thought it would be a great idea (????) to go to Wal-Mart to let him pick out a treat just moments before lunch time. Thus, empty stomachs. Ugh. “Why this sounded like a good idea?”, I . can’t . quite . say.

(Ivey was here with a friend. She has yet to venture in to the petri dish of germs that reside in this one vicinity. Also, I still view her as a perfect little Angel, why tarnish her halo?)

Now, my trip to Wonderland - oops I mean Wal-Mart - was not much different than anyone else’s you see (or hear about) in Wal-mart. You would think that we, moms, would get a clue (or a sitter), and avoid this location at all costs when children are present. You would think. But for some reason, we, moms, have an innate gene that will not allow us to be beaten, so we continue the trips again and again and again. Our hopes are to eventually walk out of the Place bursting with the filling of victory. “Why?”, I . don’t . know.

Notice moms that the dads never go to Wal-Mart with the kiddos. Obviously, they are just smarter than we are, or they are just too afraid to confront defeat, so they avoid ‘It’ all together. Smart.

I will spare you the details of our TRIP. You have witnessed it a thousand times yourselves. We were the ones you pass -quickly - thinking to yourself while raising your eyebrows, “Why doesn’t that person do…blah….blah….blah. I would never allow my children to…blah…..blah….blah.“ (If you have toddlers you’ve been there, so, “yeah right”. ) No sarcasm intended. So my plan is to take action, do something about it (the trip). There are a few options here. One, I could keep attempting to take my normally well behaved children in hopes that they will continue being adorable upon crossing the threshold. Two, I could go alone. Three, when you see me in my house slippers, PJ bottoms, children with green runny noses (with much of it dried across their faces) -screaming- about - everything -, while I stand in the middle of the isle (screaming at the kiddos to stop -screaming-) with no thought of moving to one side so that you can walk down the isle too, I have caved to the masses of Wal-Mart.