Two Sons

Knox wins the 'Most Likely to be a Cowboy' award
Walker is the forever dare devil in boots (no matter the temperature)

Sometimes I feel overwhelmingly guilty that the boys are not as privileged to have a blog too, one that people check to see their personal progress and accomplishments. I would love to say that Ivey is our only topic, but here in the real world she is not. Life is more complex than Ivey alone. You read small glimpses of our life here. What you read here is so infinitely small compared to things that really matter, even many of the accomplishments you read about Ivey.

You see, the boys are no less than Ivey. They are what people dealing with special needs children call ‘normal’. Here in our home we know that Ivey has ‘special needs’ and we know that our sons are ‘normal’, but that is not how they are treated (to the best of our abilities). Unfortunately, Ivey does, at times, require special medical treatment. That does not in any way underscore that she is more special to us, her parents, than Knox and Walker. Still, the guilt of discerning between children is incredibly weighing. But the thing is, it was like that before Ivey was born. We always wanted to show the boys the same amount of attention and time. It is a battle parents fight no matter the situation.

Often I find that I do not give credit to how smart my sons really are. They know things that most people think they are too young to understand. It is infuriating to watch other people try to water things down for them, or if I explain that a kettle really is black; then the same people look at me like I just told things the boys should only hear at a determined age bracket. I get more upset with myself when I do the exact same thing to the boys. I constantly have to remind myself that they, Knox and Walker, get ‘IT’.

Where Matt and I have ridden an emotional roller coaster for over a year, so have the boys. Not only did Ivey spend her first month in a NICU and almost two months at Scottish Rite, the boys - then 3 and 2 - also spent time without their parents. Even though grandparents and friends were there every step of the way, it wasn’t the same. A mom is a mom and a dad is a dad. Just think, there were days we were home, but mentally we were far away fatigued and exhausted. Still, two little boys triumphed through the entire thing. Happy.

We brought a special little girl home to two very special little boys. I spend my time filling this blog with information about Ivey for adults to understand her, and still many do not. Continually, we go out in to the public for adults to misinterpret that Ivey is a human being capable of love, without pity. Two little boys, now 4 and 2 ¾, have never ever treated Ivey different or ‘special’ for that matter. She is their sister. To them, she's just a sister. They play with her, talk to her, whine when she kicks them, just like any other brother would do with a sister.

The world hasn’t taught them that she is different – yet. Hopefully, by the time the world intrudes into our life, all of you will know the difference too. That being, there are special circumstances but nothing different. In the meantime, we have three beautiful children. They are all three unique and special in their own very special way.