Those were the original words, from so long ago for so many things, more things than comprehendable, in such a short amount of time.
So many parents, maybe too many parents, hear those words when facing a future with a "special" child. In the literal seconds, minutes, and hours after Ivey was born we were preparing for an end. "Be prepared, she may not make it." The blatant facts of her existence suggested her survival was minimal.
Then somehow, and some might say magically, her days and weeks turned into months and years.
In those months and years following her arrival it was suggested that we "be prepared" that other life "givens" may surpass Ivey. In many brutally wonderful ways, they did. Certain experiences have by-passed Ivey.
At one phase of time in the beginning, time was spent trying to figure out if Ivey had a sacrum bone. I think that is another Ivey trivia you may not know or remember. Because of that we were to prepare that Ivey might never roll over, sit or walk. Defiantly we prepared. Her mental capacity was chocked with limited potential based on brain scans and discovered malformations. How would that affect those things?
Then her hips began to ossify. Slowly. Oddly.
She rolled over.
She sat up.
She can stand with assistance.
I have always said we are shooting for a star, not sure which one, but she will land among them (the stars) regardless of what we think her destination, or route, should be. She is on her own trajectory.
Two things I would like to mention here.
1) Concerning physicians and specialists:
I've heard more times than I care to recount the theme line that they (doctors) ALWAYS give the worst case scenario. I do not believe that. Not a cell in my body has ever thought that. They are amazing people. They are human and they share their knowledge. They chose a profession that shows miracles and tragedies on a daily basis; nevertheless, they come back day after day determined to make a difference in the world. They deserve some latitude. You better believe not one has ever doubted her. They function in realities, they hope for miracles. They lay out the facts so that I (we) can prepare my daughter to rise above them.
2) Concerning therapists:
I feel I must apologize to any therapist who has ever worked with Ivey and all of those in her future. No matter your years of experience and knowledge, Ivey is going to do things her way and in her time. And she is going to defy doing it your way. She has her own ideas and she surprises the pants off of most of us. And she insists doing them solo and in some amazing way. Very (extremely) independent child. I share your frustration.
This month alone she has turned many pages in her book. Started a new chapter. Again we are finding that she truly is the captain of her own ship, controller of her destiny, and we are merely passengers enjoying an amazing Journey.
So be prepared. Here is her news. ..................................
Yesterday Ivey took her first step, standing independently, with Stephanie cheering her at her side and Christine cheering her forward. She stepped into complete a dark infinity. Unafraid. With confidence.
She was at school and for the first time I was happier to have missed the milestone moment. To hear the joy in Stephanie and Christine's voices, to see the excitement on their faces, and to see the love on the faces of the women in the room, that was the best gift. A priceless gift.
I have always known that this day would come for Ivey. She has taught me to believe in the impossible. It was even better seeing this day through someone else's eyes.
What I don't think I ever believed, really truly possible, despite all Ivey has taught me in Faith and I am humbled to admit ~ is this. I do not think that I have ever truly believed that someone else would truly work as hard for Ivey as Matt and I, or that they would see her without limits. I was wrong to not have that faith in others, especially those so intertwined in her tapestry.
Ivey is loved so deeply. She goes to school in a place where the possibilities are endless, a place where the people believe in Ivey as much as Matt and I. Everyone at McHenry, not just her teachers. The school is a limitless environment where the impossible is non-existent. This magical place is a dream come true. It is Peace I my heart that I never believed realistically possible. Nevertheless, Ivey steps toward these angels with complete unconditional trust.
I have waited 6 1/2 years to say this......
Be prepared world ~ very prepared ~ Ivey is on her way ~ One step at a time.
~G~
