As I was saying life is up and going again.

I keeping thinking back over the past months and man have times been hard. It is no lie. Things were hard, not impossible. I met a mom recently new to this parallel life I am living with my defiant special needs little girl. Wow. It makes me very humble. I do not ever want to forget what it was like being there with the new and unknown. Not to mention the feeling of where did the life I had planned go?

While you are in it, not that I am out of it yet, you don’t realize the wide range of emotions are normal. You have to do something with the emotions and hope that what you do turns into something positive. This blog is great and all, but I have not posted about the down days - when I was having a moment. It would be much to embarrassing, but those times are the reality also.

Now I think I am somewhere in the middle. Some days are great, some days okay, and some days down right stink.

For all the resources there are for Ivey, it is limited to resources for parents and what parent should do with themselves. As I said before, where do the parents fit in? Once Ivey was born, everything that I did on a normal day completely stopped, that includes my time with my husband, sons, friends, or for me. Sound selfish? Maybe. But I will challenge anyone to completely stop their lives for one week and live our routine and see where you stand. My parents love keeping the kiddos but I love it when we return and they start heading for the door. My point is - it takes time for life to begin again.

So here are the best three pieces of advice given to me:

1. If you feel like you are about to fall apart - don’t do it in front of your other children or take it out on your spouse (this can be hard to do at times). Get in you car and drive all the while screaming at the top of your lungs or crying your eyes out. We are all lucky that Matt’s head is still attached to his shoulders for all the times I have bitten it off.

2. Let others HELP! I still have a hard time with this one. Pride is an awful thing.

3. Get up each morning and do something normal, like shower and makeup. A friend came to visit during Ivey’s extended stay at Scottish Rite. She about died when I pulled out my heels to walk around the hospital. Sometimes you just have to take the sweat pants off no matter where you are.

By the way, I have taken all three to the pool by myself. It resembled something similar to the Bermuda Triangle and I was waiting for one to disappear never to be seen again. Nevertheless, we got up the next day and tried again.